Gabriella 🌈🦄 aka Baby G 🫶🏼

Gabby has been asking for me to write a piece about her and as I lay next to her right now I just have to comply.

"Gabriella Sofia" is the name I chose for her. She graced us with her presence on January 29th at 624pm. When I saw her and held her I felt so much love. She were this little chubby angel baby and I just knew my life would be so much better. At the time of her birth, David and I were going through a rough patch and kind of separated but I knew when he held her that she had already won him over.

I always joke around that if all my pregnancies and deliveries were as easy as Gabby's I would have had an army of Baby G's. She was good in my belly, active but easy, idk what it was but I was going through tough times and maybe she sensed it and took it easy on me. That sounds so much like her.

She's like that now. She's my angel. She notices all the small things, she cares if she sees me sad and instantly hugs me and tries to make it better.

"I'm so proud of your kindness. I hope this cruel world doesn't change you because you are amazing and I really believe that you can change the world. I can't tell you how much I love you but I hope you feel it every single day. You have made my life easier, you always make me smile and I'm so glad you're mine. "

Gabby was a good fetus lol, a good baby, a happy baby, and she's incredible now. I can sing this kid praises all day. As a toddler she was hilarious and brave and outgoing and fearless. Even then she was super independent. She's become my bestie, she's always down for anything. She helps me when she feels like I need it, it's always a nice surprise.

Sometimes I look at her and I just wonder how did I get so lucky and I thank God for her and I thank David for her. She was such a daddy's girl. She had this thing where she sucked her thumb and rubbed David's earlobe to fall asleep. It was like instant melatonin. She just needed her daddy and boom, out like a light. I feel so bad that she lost him so soon, he was many things, but he was a great dad.

Gabby has always loved to take pictures and make videos. I have sooooooo many on my phone. She had David in her pocket with that too, they took so many pics on Snapchat with funny filters on. When he wasn't working and was a stay at home dad,he would always send me pics or videos of them doing funny things. For the first few yrs of life it was always Gabby, Julian and David. They were inseparable. David and Julian understood each other on a level I didn't understand. But I guess we all have a favorite parent right. Gabby and Julian looked and still kinda look like twins. She's very smart and mature for her age and he's right on target as a 10 yr old boy. Her maturity is uncanny.

"I hate that you lost your daddy. I hate that you were so small you may forget certain things about him. There have been a few times where I can just see your wheels turning and you drop a heavy bomb on me. Last night was one of them. (She asked me if I'm going to remarry so she can have a dad again. She said she's tired of not having one)

Baby girl you are my world.

I hate that you think about things that you have no business thinking about.

That conversation we had last night really took me by surprise. Honestly I might still be processing because it was heavy. I wish I could give you what you want but I don't know if what you want is even doable."

How do I crush her little optimistic heart so early on? How do I explain to her how complicated relationships are?

That you can't just marry anyone. That finding real love is not like the fairytales and half the time the person you want to be with, doesn't like you back. I love her innocence, I love how dreamy she is, how positive and persistent she is. I refuse to let this ugly world make her bitter. For HER I need to get my shit together and make sure she's happy. Happiness is always the goal.

I LOVE YOU MAMACITA 🌈♥️